Melting Doubts

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I was out walking and enjoying the cool air on my face. I felt invigorated by a walk along a sidewalk I was exploring for the first time, and then it happened.

I was in this beautiful experience, a wonderful walk when I noticed, once again, the tendency for skeptical doubts to arise. I often have a subtle thinking process involved with doubt. I may ask myself the following things: How things are going? Am I doing a good job? Is this a safe or useful way to do something? and so on.

So as I went back and forth between the bliss of a beautiful, chilly morning walk and a subtle, low-level concern that something is wrong, I was stopped short, transfixed on…

The sun glistening off of the frozen drops of what had been rain some hours before. The drops, hanging off of a metal loop in a neighbors yard, had frozen in the unusually chilly April morning air. I had a two-fold realization that caused me to relax quite a lot.

I was wondering about choices I’d made and doubting whether the timing of some things was good, bad, or otherwise when I realized that.

  1. There’s no going back.
  2. These thoughts are all self-created worry and, many if not most of them are not even based in reality or truth.
  3. Old decisions cannot be remade.
  4. So I can enjoy the present. (if I am not trying to go back)

You see, I realized anew that no matter what the doubt or concern is, I have a choice.

I can go with the doubt in my mind, a pattern long established, but of little to no use.

Or

I can be present to the beautiful, chilly morning and enjoy the walk.

You see, the message of the frozen droplets of water was that they were not there hours before, but existed right there and then just as they should be. Old decisions cannot be remade.

Looking back on it I imagine that almost for certain those icy drops are now gone…and that’s just how it is. Nothing wrong; nothing to change. No doubt.

Reality Check

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Well, the past few weeks have been anything but normal. Glad that I am in retreat for the time being. Dan the observer, are you there?

Yes, Dan in retreat, what’s up?

Today I had a meditation session related to Hildegard of Bingen.

You mean that mystic from the Middle Ages?

You got it. She was a pretty amazing human.

All right. How did it go?

Well, let me tell you about some of what she wrote, and I think it will be obvious.

Okay. Shoot.

The topics of light and love recur throughout her writings. She also writes of being good stewards of what is on earth. In fact, she took my breath away when she said that if humans misuse their place on earth that the divine justice of God is such that nature is allowed to “give a reminder”.

What’s that about?

Well, I can’t read her mind from here, but I expect this corona virus has given us all an opportunity to think about whether we are being good stewards of what we’ve been given on earth to use. And how we wish to be with each other-especially now that we are somewhat quarantined from each other.

It does make me think.

Yeah, me too. In fact I asked those meditating with me tonight to meditate on her words. We did, and my insight was that “Love is easy and easeful when I let it be. Also that there’s no time to wait to be loving, and finally, that God or the Universe is always ready to support us in what we do.

So that’s what you were up to

I hope others can have their own insights and share, too.


Locus of Focus

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I noticed, Dan.

Noticed what? Dan the observer of me in retreat.

Well, you look concerned. Are you?

Shouldn’t I be? All of us are supposed to stay at home under the threat of unwittingly spreading the COVID-19 virus.

Yeah. It makes sense to be concerned, but.

Well, I’m trying to prepare to carry out work online and have so much to do…

So does everyone.

Of course. You know, I am really enjoying how much those I work with are collaborating to get things done.

So what’s the problem?

I guess there’s really no problem as such…

And? … I guess, I’m wondering about when you sit in meditation. By the way, good job getting in extra meditation each day. You’re coming along good with that.

Thanks.

When you sit in meditation, what are you noticing?

Well, if there’s really nothing wrong, then what could it be?

Good question.

…

Oh, I remember now. Anytime I am concerned it is from giving up a sense of taking care of business from within. You know, that is what I haven’t been noticing.

What do you mean?

That the concerns I have are about what is coming at me from without, not within.

You mean, things are okay?

Yeah. Mostly. Of course, concerns related to the virus and the need to be vigilant, responsible, and careful are all real things, but the concern comes from taking cues from without.

And, therefore, not what?

Acting within, including allowing myself to be calm. But I’m reading a book that gave me another insight related to that.

What’s that?

Dan, the observer, this is Dan in retreat signing off.

Hey?!

Don’t worry. That insight will be in my next blog.

For now, I’m going to get back to taking care of business.

Noticing

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Hi Dan, the watcher. It’s Dan in retreat. I noticed several things while on retreat.

What’s that? ….

Oh, I’ll continue. To answer your question you asked just before I began to write, it’s going well. I am learning that I can get in all the things that I NEED to do, and reconsidering what those THINGS are.

I will keep at this learning. It’s so important to me, I mean, for us. I’m beginning to be more patient with myself. I noticed, too, that being patient with myself bears fruit I hadn’t thought of before beginning to actually be patient with myself.

Further, I find it interesting that the more I can be patient with myself and realistic, the more I can sit in meditation and the more passionate about continuing I become. Peaceful and Passionate. I like that combination.

Hopefully, I can learn what it means to undertake to train myself to awaken for the sake of all sentient beings.

Much Love, Dan

Right back at ya, man.

Second Post: Work Wins

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Hi There, Dan. It’s Dan. I am watching and learning about you. Love your intention and effort. Good idea to use your time away from work as a retreat. (Note to self: you can bring this intention to your life even if things change again.)

I’m writing because I noticed that you have an intention to use time away from your physical work space, school, to use more as a retreat, but ran into a speed bump yesterday.

Here’s what I noticed about your day. Your idea of bringing a retreat like atmosphere to all you do got crowded out by your concern for your job.

You spent some good time in the morning yesterday meditating in a way that grows your meditative experience. “Good job,” as your teacher might say.

What happened later was that you continued to work, work, work, on your job–not a bad thing in itself, but by the time you got to the evening and ready for bed you hadn’t taken the time to meditate in the evening that you were planning to do.

It’s all learning. Keep with it…..

Life as a Retreat Begins

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Quarantine comes from the time of the Black Death in Fourteenth Century Venice. To contain infection people stayed forty days on ships, the Italian word for forty becomes the English, quarantine.

So I am quarantined; that suits me fine. More time to meditate. I will meditate away the extra time that I thought I didn’t have to meditate buy only a week ago.

Glad so many will join me. We’re in this together. In the midst of social distancing, we are connected via social media and our need for connection, collaboration and, well, love.

Today I led a session on loving kindness. My dear teachers taught me that that is what is currently of need.

May we continue to share.

See you soon.

Dan in meditative quarantine, life as a retreat….

Why a retreat. More on that tomorrow.

Connection Poem

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Good Day. Here is a poem that landed on me this week. It is called “Connection”


I draw up beside you; we’re together, you next to me.
We embrace the warmth of friendly, human contact, joy in sharing a moment together.
Standing together, I remove my coat and tie so that nothing can come between our raw, human togetherness, and we’re connected.
I wish to hug the world as brothers and sisters; our raw, fallible, humanness coming together, connected.
I’d like to take off my way of being that conflicts with your way of being. We’re connected.
What could we do if our raw, humanness touched the humanness of each other?
What could we do if we were the hope for each other that we want for ourselves?
What could we do if our ways of being like the discarded coat and tie didn’t come between our raw, humane connection?

With Joy,
Dan

Goal Setting Tips: Making Goals Possibilities

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Have you considered why it may be hard to achieve goals once set?

I found out one simple step to ensure that goals become possibilities. (Of course, it involves, like all things, follow through.)

Many times I have set goals and not achieved them. I have been pleased to have progressed, but in the back of my mind would liked to have gone further than 60-80% of the way to the goal.

Other times, I totally got sidetracked. Often, now, I have greater success that has come from building determination, it is true, but also because I discovered a missing step.

It landed on me about a year or two ago that something was missing… and that was….how to go beyond setting the goal.

Goal-Setting tips: (My version of how to make realistic and achievable goals)

  1. Set a goal with an end-date; (so you know whether you made it or not)
  2. Make sure it’s achievable; (it is within your skill set or a set of skills you can develop  during the target time period.)
  3. Set the next step that will lead to getting there–ongoing; (once achieved, add the next step.)

It is as simple as that. This last part was missing for over ten years while I was a goal-setting maniac bent on growth. Now I am a goal-achieving developer of skills bent on growth. Hope you’ll join us. There are many in the world…

Please share this information so those who wish to achieve will go beyond hoping things go well.

Freedom and Independence Trap

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July 4, 2018: The Fourth of July is called “Independence Day” and is commonly associated with “freedom”.

Have you considered what this means to so many?

I considered and shared below some musings from a meditation today that demonstrates some of what these terms and this day means to me.

I have observed that conditioned patterns, formed from decisions made while quite young, usually pull me to act or react in certain ways. This pulling, associated with thoughts does not equate with freedom or independence.

The freedom to act in life comes from being totally present in the moment, thinking and then moving from that place into a goal or life’s purpose. Certainly, freedom and independence are not equated with seeing things clouded by previously decided or determined views.

So be present and act on your own. That would be true independence and freedom.

Further, falling into thinking of a need to be either “free” or “independent” can be considered a catchy situation, too. Neither is substantially real in and of itself and as such are created concepts put on top of being free to independently act in the moment.

Happy Fourth of July everyone. And for those in Canada who celebrated Canada Day a few days ago, best to you. These two created holidays represent the concept as well.

Calmly going forth,

Dan O’Brien

Frailty thy name is human: Shakesepeare’s Hamlet

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In Shakespeare’s Hamlet, a famous scene mentions that “Frailty, thy name is woman”. I would suggest that Frailty, thy name is human.

We all have our faults. As we are reading about Othello this week in my high school class, we see a man, manly as they come, subdued by being succumbed. He was a man, a human, frail in the moment as a result of being human. Need I say more. The Moor was ta’en by the Venetian. Frailty could overcome any of us. It is not a characteristic of women, but of being human. Frailty, the nature is human. Long live learning to live. Love and peace, Dan